Tuesday 18 March 2014

March Update

It's been a slow month since I last wrote. I've not been very well, fighting off an infection and eating far too much. My skin is a disaster zone and I've been really trying to drink more water and to eat more fruits and vegetables to help it. I'm hoping that now the weather has turned a bit warmer and sunnier that it will improve my skin.

I've been slightly obsessed by food while I've been trying to diet. No further weight loss to report but neither have I gained any weight so I'm really happy about that. In the attempts to help my skin, I've been trying to "eat the rainbow" - eating fruits and vegetables of all different colours, not just your typical greens.

I've been really inspired by a couple of cooking shows recently and I've been cooking alot more. I did get a bit lazy earlier this year and relied quite alot on ready prepared foods and packaged foods and, gulp, fast food. But, The Hairy Bikers' Asian Adventure and Mary Berry Cooks have been great shows and I've tried a couple of recipes already.

It's also really inspiring me to go to Asia and explore all these places that I've never been to before. Well, anywhere really. I'd love to go on holiday, but the age old question of where and who to go with stands in the way. Loads of people I know have gone away skiing and snowboarding, and while I love doing that too, I think I need a hot holiday!! Although then I really would have to stick to the diet to get ready for the beach and the dreaded bikini!

Happy eating and watching, folks!

Wednesday 12 February 2014

Valentine's Day

Doesn't time fly when you're having fun? It doesn't really feel like it's been a year since the previous Valentine's Day. I remember this time last year when I was feeling stupidly excited at the prospect of actually spending Valentine's Day as part of a couple. Last year, I went to the effort of buying a card and a thoughtful gift, as well as booking tickets for a show for us to go to. He bought me some chocolates, not a very original choice but a lovely gesture. This year I am very much single and not really looking forward to Friday.

Even this week, in the lead up to the most, supposedly, romantic day of the year, I've been surrounded by red hearts and cards and suggestions of what to buy for your loved one. Of course, I would do some of these things if I had a partner, but I wouldn't necessarily just do them for this day. I like to buy surprise gifts and write cards throughout the year, not just one day. Also, I don't believe that it has to cost a lot of money - something handmade or created by my partner would mean a thousand times more to me than something bought in the shops. And ultimately, I am looking for love, not presents or material things that I can buy for myself or save up for.

I think one of the things that I have missed most while being single, is physical closeness and intimacy. I'm not just talking about sex, but rather the cuddles and hugs, the kisses, the hand holding, brushing the hair back off my face, stroking my back, that sort of thing. I miss being with someone. Even when I am surrounded by all my family and friends there is still an overwhelming sense of loneliness.

Here's hoping for a lovely day for everyone, no matter where you are, or who you're with.
Much love xx

Friday 31 January 2014

Kung Hei Fat Choi!

Happy Chinese New Year! Today marks the start of the Year of the Horse.

Today I wore red as that is a lucky colour, I ate noodles as they represent longevity, or long life, I haven't used a broom or dustpan and brush, so as not to sweep any good luck away, and I haven't used any knives or scissors either, which is considered to be bad luck. I'm not particularly superstitious but these are traditional customs that I've grown up with. Also, I figure that I can do with as much luck and good fortune that I can muster for this year!

I can't really believe that it's the end of January already. I've had a pretty good month actually, despite all this cold and rainy weather we've been having. Seriously, can it please stop raining soon? I've managed to have an alcohol-free January apart from 2 nights, one being a good friend's birthday night out and the other was an evening with some other friends. I feel so much better for it, especially as in the run up to Christmas and New Year I was out drinking most nights. Hopefully the break has been good for my liver and overall health.

Speaking of health, although I haven't managed to stick to my diet (in fact today I have already eaten 8 chocolates) I have been really good and have been exercising at least twice a week for the last month. I've lost the weight that I put on over Christmas, and hopefully will now be on track to lose the final 4kg. I know this last bit will be the hardest to lose, but I am determined to get rid of it over the next couple of months. I'm going to up the exercise, and next week, after the Chinese New Year celebrations, get back to being a little bit stricter with the diet. To be honest, I would rather do more exercise and still be able to enjoy my food, but I know that it will help if I can stop eating the chocolates!

I feel like I'm almost ready to go back into the world of dating again. I know I can't let this year pass me by in a haze of moping about and wanting to be with the wrong person again. Hopefully, my self confidence will be boosted with the extra weight loss and going out on social events will put me in the path of other like-minded people. Even if nothing romantic happens, I am going to have fun and enjoy my life because life is short... It's a New Year, New Start, New Me.

Tomorrow I have family celebrations and over the next few months I have lots of lovely special occasions to look forward to. I do wish that I had someone in my life to share these things with, but I know that will happen in time. For now, I am truly thankful and blessed to have my family and friends around me.

To anyone else out there that is feeling a bit down or depressed, things will get better. You just have to believe it, and in yourself.

Wishing everyone a very happy and prosperous Chinese New Year.
Mei x

Tuesday 21 January 2014

Cirque du Soleil - Quidam

I was lucky enough to get tickets for this show last year and went to see it at the Royal Albert Hall this weekend. I'm a big fan of all the Cirque du Soleil shows, and this was my fourth time. I remember the very first time I went - I was absolutely mesmerised by the amazing acrobatics and aerial displays. The sheer strength and flexibility and skill of the artists. It was truly captivating. I think each time I've seen them since I have still been amazed but slightly less so, as I know what sort of things to expect and what the artists are capable of. Nothing will ever compare to that first experience, when I had no idea what to expect - that had serious WOW factor.

Having said that, I still really enjoyed this year's show. It's on until the 16th February 2014 but I'm not sure how good the ticket availability is now. I booked mine quite early last year and had a super view from the stalls at the front of the stage. I believe that this particular show, Quidam, will not be performed in the UK again so if you get the chance to see it then do!

Sunday 5 January 2014

My Latest Lust - Pixi Glow Tonic

Following on from yesterday's posts, I thought I'd share with you something that I did manage to purchase - Pixi Glow Tonic. First of all, I just want to say that by no means am I an expert in skincare or beauty products. I know my own skin type and what suits it, and I have been through many brands and products through trial and error. I'm not being paid or endorsed to blog about this.


Anyway, back to the Glow Tonic. I first discovered this in September 2013 and have been using this for about 3 months, once a day in the evening. The instructions say you can use it twice a day but I found that was a little too much for my skin so I just use it before I go to bed. This product is an exfoliating tonic, and contains Glycolic acid that loosens the dead skin cells. It feels so much gentler on my skin than using abrasive exfoliating scrubs.

The benefits of this product have been raved about on numerous other beauty blogs, which I avidly read before purchasing my first bottle (as said before, I like to do my research before spending money on expensive products) and this caused a huge demand for it. Luckily, I live in London so getting to the one and only Pixi shop is not out of reach. I really do dislike the fact that some people capitalise on this and are selling this on eBay and suchlike, for overly inflated prices.

The exciting news is that the Glow Tonic, and other Pixi products, are now available to buy online! So hopefully this will help everyone have access to these products!

A few thoughts on this - for anyone who has purchased this before, they have now changed the bottle that it comes in from the pump dispenser to a screw on cap. The quantity is still the same though, 250ml for £16. If you like the original pump dispenser (some people do not like the way it squirts out the product and thus causes wastage) then keep the old bottle and you can fill it up from the new bottle. The product is also slightly more red in colour than the old pale yellow tonic - I asked the sales assistant about this and she said that it's just a new batch of stock but exactly the same ingredients.

I used the new bottle last night and am pleased to report that it doesn't feel any different to the old one.

The reason why I went to buy this now, and not when my old bottle is finished, is because there is a 20% off discount code from Caroline Hirons' blog - beauty industry guru who gave a big thumbs up to this product. The code is valid until the 12th January 2014. Unfortunately, at the time of writing the Glow Tonic is listed as out of stock on the website, but when I was in the shop the sales assistant told me that they have a huge backorder which they are trying to mail out. If you want to order one before the promotion ends, I'd recommend ordering over the telephone - you might just have to wait for a few days for it to be posted out to you.

I'm super happy to have bought this as I really like this - at only £16 it's a fraction of what you'd pay for other similar items, but with the added 20% off it's a complete steal.

Saturday 4 January 2014

Warning - Orogold Cosmetics

Today I was making the most of my last Saturday off before going back to work after the festive holidays. I went to Oxford Street. Was I out of my mind? Quite possibly. I went with the intention of having a look at the sales and picking up some bargains but the crowds of people were really annoying and I couldn't find anything in my size so I gave up. I ended up wandering down New Bond Street, which was considerably less crowded, and with the rain starting up again, I found myself strolling along quite happily until a man suddenly said to me,  'Would you like a sample of our face cream?' and thrust a small white sachet into my hand.

I was quite startled, but as I love skincare products and toiletries, I was immediately intrigued. I looked up at the shop and didn't recognise the name, Orogold. The salesman had already started talking to me and complimenting me on my skin and asked if I would like to try the product. I should have said no, but as I wasn't busy, I thought why not and followed him into the very empty shop. He demonstrated this exfoliating peel on my hand, which seemed very impressive as it appeared to rub off loads of dead skin, and followed this with a moisturiser. Then, the hard sell - the products were beautifully packaged and came with a hefty price tag - £100 and £129 respectively for the exfoliator and moisturiser. I immediately said no, as that is way out of my price budget, and as I have very sensitive skin, I never buy anything too expensive without thorough research and sampling.

His initial response to my negative answer was, you're shopping on Bond Street, it can't be too expensive for you. Then he tried to lower the prices of the products and offering me special discounted deals if I bought certain bundles of products. Again, I kept saying no. He even took 2 boxes over to the till to show me the special amazing price I'd pay today. When I tried to leave, he showed me their 'salon' where customers have facials and beauty treatments and tried to talk me into having a half price facial.

He was very pushy and rude, trying to make out that he was offering me something really special that is not offered to all customers. He was certainly very complimentary, and I do understand that he is a salesman and this is his job, but that made me even more determined not to buy anything from him, or this brand ever.

When I got home, I searched on the internet for reviews about this brand, and I've come across mixed reviews. There are glowing reports extolling the virtues of these creams and lotions, and then there are some downright scary reviews, which makes me feel sorry for customers who got sucked into buying these products. The exfoliating peel apparently contains some kind of glue like ingredient, which doesn't take a scientist to figure out that what happens is similar to when you were a kid playing with PVA glue sticking things together and a bit almost dries on your skin and you rub it off and it's a little ball of gluey stuff. I'm not saying it's not a good product, but to be honest I'd rather save my £100 and spend a little on something else that is about the product and not the packaging and most of all, does not pay the pushy and aggressive salespeople that work for this brand.

So be warned not to get sucked into these shops, or engage in conversation with these salespeople. I've read a number of horror stories now and am glad that I managed to get out of the shop without buying anything. I did not expect these kinds of aggressive sales tactics from such an alleged high end brand, with a shop on New Bond Street! You have been warned!

Happy New Year

Happy New Year!!! Hope everyone had a lovely Christmas and New Year. Mine was spent in a family haze of too much food, films and fun. Now I'm back in London, getting ready for the return to work on Monday - booooo - I just know that I'm going to regret my newfound love of staying up late and getting up late.

Anyway, as always, with the start of a new year, thoughts turn to resolutions and the usual hopes that this year I'll stick to my intentions of not drinking, eating less, doing more exercise, blah blah blah. I'm not going to formally make resolutions as every year I always break them. But I do intend on making the most of myself and this year. Last year was pretty crappy and I hope that this year will bring happier times.

Much love to everyone x

Friday 11 October 2013

Real versus Imagined Heartbreak

I have had my fair share of heartbreak over the years, real heart wrenching anguish when all of my relationships have ended. I've never been the one to do the breaking up, always been on the receiving end. So I think I'm pretty experienced in this. 

In the last couple of weeks, I've heard stories from friends about their love lives. Don't get me wrong, I have alot of time for my friends and want to help them in any way that I can. And I also understand and appreciate that different people deal with things in different ways. But in two instances, I really want to just say to them to pull themselves together and stop making a mountain out of a molehill.

One friend, who I only recently got to know, was telling me how she'd ended things with this guy who I thought she was dating. As she described what had happened, it transpired that they had never dated, had just met through work and had messaged each other a few times. They had tried to arrange a date but it never happened. This went on for a few months, until she decided that enough was enough and that she wasn't going to waste anymore time on him. She went on about him at length, questioning his motives and whether there was something wrong with him, and how upset she was at how he has treated her. I agreed that she shouldn't waste anymore effort on him, as I am a firm believer that if someone is interested in you, then no matter what, they will make the effort to contact you and see you, and not make flimsy excuses. 

What I really wanted to say, but felt that I couldn't say, because I don't know her very well and I didn't want to offend her, is why all the fuss about someone where nothing happened? They were not dating or in a relationship, they were not friends as they met through work and have a professional relationship of sorts, but nothing ever really took off. How can you end things when they didn't even technically start?! And you can't even call it a crush as to begin with, she had rejected his offer of a date!

The other friend, was definitely suffering from a crush, unrequited love... She is the same age as me, and as far as I can tell, has never been in a long term relationship before. For the past couple of years, yes, years, she has been mooning over a boy in her department. Again, they never dated or even had the slightest whiff of a romantic involvement. Recently, she found out that the guy in question is now engaged to someone else, and she is berating herself for being so silly and wasting time on him, and saying how now she can look back and say he wasn't the guy for her. Err, hello! I could've told her this two years ago!! 

I don't understand how some girls can get so caught up in something imaginary. I'm trying really hard to be objective here, as I know it's not nice to be rejected or know that someone you like doesn't like you back. However, this second friend had obviously misconstrued something in her head, as she and the boy had never even spent time alone chatting to each other, or even going out socially together. Anything that happened was just circumstantial from them being in the same department.

I'm not trying to say that their hurt is any less than mine, but it is a little frustrating they are making it into such a big deal. I am struggling to keep my emotions in check because the man I love doesn't want to be with me, after making such wonderful promises and actually dating and being with me. The others had never been on a date with the person, had not even been alone with that person for a prolonged period of time, had never put themselves out there to even get hurt. I would understand more if they had gone out a couple of times and then the guy decided that it wasn't right but the girl still liked them...

Am I being too harsh? Am I just being a bitch? I just don't get it. I know it's easy for me as an outsider to say this, and they have real feelings for these people, but when they tell me that nothing actually happened, and they act like it's the biggest heartbreak on Earth, I just want them to feel what I am currently feeling, and maybe then they'd know what true heartbreak is...

Saturday 5 October 2013

Another year older...

... But not necessarily wiser.

I can't believe it's been another year. I started off with such good intentions of regularly blogging but I have been rubbish.

When I last blogged, I had just been on a few dates with the older man I'd previously dated. However, after I found out that he was still active in the online dating world, I ended that pretty sharpish and I haven't spoken to or seen him since. I found that really easy to let go of, as a couple of weeks later I met a new guy, let's call him Mr Sporty, as he loves watching and playing sport, and things snowballed from a few conversations to our magical first date, to him giving me keys to his flat, mini-breaks away and what I thought to be a very promising relationship. Unfortunately, that ended in April this year, and since then I've been fighting a losing battle to get over him.

Since turning the ripe old age of 33, I've been making more of a concerted effort to forget about Mr Sporty, but I had a setback last night when I saw that he had befriended a girl on Facebook. Yes, my nemesis Facebook. I love it, but I also hate it, and I haven't had the strength to remove him from my list of friends. It may be a completely innocent friend, or it might be a new lady interest. Either way, it really upset me and I went to bed crying and didn't sleep very well.

I know I have to get over him, it's been almost 6 months since we broke up and I've not moved on. I had hoped that things could be resolved, but as more time passes it seems less likely. I've not actually seen him for almost 2 months, and I think our last conversation was about a month ago. It has been really hard to not talk to him, or contact him in any way. I thought it was hard with Mr Special, but this time round it seems to have been even harder. Every time even the smallest thing makes me want to text him, or call him. We used to spend hours on the phone, and now it's nothing.

Wow, I really have not moved on in my life in a year. Two steps forward and 3 steps back... I am, to quote my own words, pining after someone who doesn't want to be with me.

Okay, now that I have admitted, yet again, in a public forum no less, what a loser I am, this is the end of this crap year. Things are going to get better, starting from now. The first day of the rest of my life.

Go me :-)

Wednesday 31 October 2012

Happy Halloween!

I had a Halloween party at the weekend and have another one to go to tomorrow night, but nothing planned for the actual night tonight. To be honest, I'm quite glad to have a night in! There were a few kids on the bus ride home tonight dressed up, and I passed a family trick-or-treating on the road next to my road, but apart from that, I've not had any Halloween goings-ons! No kids have rung on my doorbell, but I think that is due to living in a top floor flat :-)

So... I went on the date last week and had a very nice time. Really nice time. But I'm still in a quandary over what to do about his being on a dating site. I guess given that we are not in a serious committed relationship then I cannot say anything. But I do feel weird that he is communicating with and dating other girls while seeing me. We have made tentative arrangements to see each other this weekend.

I think I will just have to see if anything comes of dating this guy. I don't want to call it a day just yet, so watch this space!

In other news, I went to see the new James Bond movie, Skyfall, on Sunday. It is, without a shadow of a doubt, the best film I have seen this year! No spoilers, but it has lots of action, humour, emotion, charm... just SO good. I know it has pretty much been a sellout but do go soon if you have the chance. I am going to go again, it was that good it warrants a second viewing!

Happy Halloween x